Nightmares of a 2ww

I really need to get a new head!  One that doesn't dwell on stuff and scare the crap outta me or my bumbles.  

For the last couple of nights I've been suffering from what I call 2ww nightmares.  The first was a bizarre dream that had me performing in a Prince video and it was really turning me on (Prince in a sexual dream, I told you it was a nightmare!!).  Anyway I woke myself up in a panic as we had strict instructions for me not to orgasm during the 2ww.  When I awoke I had strong cramps.  Nooooo! 

Another nightmare involved me waking up to find blood all over my pajamas.  Charming!!
  
And last night, I dreamt I had to go to the doctor (not my usual one) and when I told him I'd just had IVF he said outright..."you know they'll all die don't you".  I was stunned at first, and then got really really angry.  I yelled back at him, "How dare you say that, I have hope, you don't know what you are talking about!".

Holy shit, what is my mind trying to do to me and my little bumbles?  Am I that messed up in the head (you don't have to answer that!)?  And there was me thinking I was being positive about this IVF cycle. Hmm, I guess my subconscious is out to try and prove me wrong.  Anyone else experiencing nightmares or had this happen during the 2ww?

On the positive side of things, I've got tender boobies.  I've read that can just be a side effect of progesterone but still, it might not be. I've also been up every night peeing which doesn't usually happen very often, and during the day we are having to visit every store bathroom when out & about.  Isn't it a bit early to be having a weak bladder?  On top of that I've been having mild cramps and twinges.  Nothing major other than that one night after the Prince video.  Note to self, the bumbles aren't digging Prince!

So despite my silly nightmares I'm trying to focus on staying positive during this cruel 2ww.  I know that the signs might not be attributed to the bumbles snuggling in and calling my belly home for the next 9 months, but I'm still holding out hope.  In the end, what will be will be, and we'll find out on July 12 if the signs were all pointing in the right direction.

In the meantime, a restful night's sleep is on order!